A large majority of secondary and post-secondary schools in the United States offer interscholastic athletics for their students, though even those who don’t may still find (subversive) ways to participate. I won’t argue the advantages/disadvantages, but in recent decades school athletics have become a financial boom or boondoggle, depending on your perspective.
Aside from the very original and unique Anteaters of UC Irvine, team nicknames lack much originality: how many Bulls, Bulldogs, Cardinals, Eagles, Hawks, Knights, Lions, Panthers, Raiders, Tigers, Warriors, and Wildcats do we really need? How many schools have just moved on from Braves, Indians, and Redskins? [Granted it’s professional baseball, but I loved the furor over Tampa Bay Devil Rays.]
Epiphany
My sister’s family moved to Newton, IA when my brother-in-law started accepted a job at Maytag headquarters, prior to Maytag being purchased by Whirlpool.
During one visit, it somehow came up that the local school district uses the nickname Cardinals for extra-curricular activities. I’m sure you’re not surprised that I found that lame-o.
And then it hit me: why not the Figs, as in Fig Newton (which I love)? Make it The Fighting Figs and get Nabisco to throw in some sponsorship dollars and it all works, right? Maybe, maybe not, but it got me thinking …
Proposed Nicknames
- Motley (MN) Crew
- Downy (CA) Woodpeckers
- Newton (IA) Fighting Figs
- Macon (GA) Bacons
- Brewster (KA) Tycoons
- Oneida (NY) Silver Spoons
- Portland (OR) Mixers
- Amarillo (TX) Brillos (or Camarillos)
- Moriarty (TX) Professors
- Post (TX) Toasties
- Eau Claire (WI) Eclairs
- La Cross (WI) Sticks
Final Thoughts
This is just the beginning, I’m sure there are plenty more obvious ones. Maybe next we start a campaign to change the name, get press coverage, get students excited, etc., etc. Anything’s possible, right?!?
